Has Jealousy robbed you of living life to the fullest? For many years, I was enslaved by its powerful grip and it almost destroyed me.
You may or may not know that I have an identical twin brother. Growing up, we were inseparable and literally did everything together. As we became young adults, my parents encouraged us toward what they thought best for our careers, not in a forceful way, but as any loving parent would do. They thought my twin brother had strong leadership qualities, so they thought he would be a great preacher. Naturally, they spoke this over his life. To my frustration, they didn’t envision that for me. They saw me as a more reserved person, not quite as dynamic or strong. And even though my parents couldn’t see my God-given potential or calling, I still believed God had put an overwhelming desire deep down on the inside to share truths from God’s Word with people. I wanted them to discover the same hope and freedom I had found in Christ.
The fact that my parents would encourage my brother to be a preacher, but not me, was quite disheartening to say the least, especially since it was a dream I believe God gave me. Ashamedly, I became jealous and envious of my brother and it began to eat me up! In fact, it consumed me. The Bible says,
“A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body; jealousy is like cancer in the bones” (Proverbs 14:30 NLT).
This verse sums up exactly what was happening. I was being eaten up by jealousy and it was like cancer in my bones. I resented my brother simply because he was receiving praise for something I desperately wanted.
One day, God spoke to me while I was driving somewhere, “Cory, I am pleased with whom I made you!” I didn’t understand exactly what He meant at the time, but over the course of the next several years, He exposed areas of my life where I was not pleased with whom He made me and the journey He had me on.
Jesus had to teach His disciple Peter this very lesson.
“‘I tell you the truth, when you were young, you were able to do as you liked; you dressed yourself and went wherever you wanted to go. But when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and others will dress you and take you where you don’t want to go.’ Jesus said this to let him know by what kind of death he would glorify God. Then Jesus told him, “Follow me.” Peter turned around and saw behind them the disciple Jesus loved—the one who had leaned over to Jesus during supper and asked, “Lord, who will betray you?” Peter asked Jesus, “What about him, Lord?” Jesus replied, ‘If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? As for you, follow me’” (John 21:18-22 NLT).
Jesus revealed to Peter what his future would look like and he quickly pointed to John and said, “Well, what about him, Lord?” It’s easy to want to compare struggles, careers, successes, influence, money, friends, situations…etc. to others. Jesus revealed a powerful truth for Peter and for all of us, which was to simply follow Him. What God did with John was none of Peter’s business and what God does with others in our lives is none of our business from the standpoint of comparing. God is inviting each of us to simply run our own race. The Scriptures declare,
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out of us” (Hebrews 12:1 NIV).
There is so much freedom when we can keep our eyes fixed on ourselves and the plan God has for us individually! If we try to compare our circumstances, the way we look, our finances, house, education, whether we receive encouragement or not, or anything else, we will have unrest in our hearts and it will be like cancer to our bones or like drinking poison. God had a unique plan for Peter and He does for each one of us, too!
And just as Jesus asked Peter to follow Him, God is asking you and me to follow Him. I had to let go of the hurt and pain and trust God, in His infinite wisdom, that He knows what He is doing with me, whether I received validation from my parents or not. Little by little, with God’s help, I released the situation to Him and trusted Him to help me fulfill my unique God-given assignment. I stopped comparing myself to my twin brother and truly wanted him to succeed at whatever he put his hand to! I started encouraging him instead of resenting him, and I looked for ways to genuinely support him! It was amazing to see God transform my heart and mind! I was free! My pain and discouragement turned to joy!
Today, I am preaching and leading others into a relationship with Jesus Christ just like God had put in my heart all those years ago. And my parents can actually see that God has called me to preach, too. In fact, they told me that God had blinded them from seeing what God was up to so that I would have to learn to trust God by faith. They are now my biggest supporter!
I am convinced that if I would not have let go of jealousy, bitterness, and the unhealthy desire to be someone else, I would still be stuck on the sidelines of life right now! And I definitely wouldn’t be stepping into the incredible calling and purpose God had marked out for me.
Just like me, you have a choice. You can choose to let go of jealousy, resentment and comparison or you can continue to let these poisonous emotions and carnal traits rob you of God’s best. Choose life! Choose to trust God and His purpose for you and watch Him blow your mind with the good things He wants to do in and through you. He did it for me and He eagerly desires to do it for you!
